{"id":1583,"date":"2018-09-20T17:50:11","date_gmt":"2018-09-20T14:50:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/findmykids.org\/blog\/?p=1583"},"modified":"2026-03-26T17:07:15","modified_gmt":"2026-03-26T14:07:15","slug":"hello-everyone-im-new-or-how-to-help-a-child-adapt-to-a-new-group","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/findmykids.org\/blog\/en\/hello-everyone-im-new-or-how-to-help-a-child-adapt-to-a-new-group","title":{"rendered":"Helping a Child Adapt to a New Group: Hello everyone, I\u2019m new!"},"content":{"rendered":"

Situations where a child joins a new group \u2013 be it at school, a new circle of friends or sport team \u2013 happen regularly and for some more than others. A new group always incurs stress in that it makes you try to adapt as easily as possible.<\/em><\/p>\n

Findmykids<\/a> tells parents what they should do in order to help the child adapt to the new group painlessly.<\/em><\/p>\n

Depending on their age the child will worry about different aspects of their life in the new group.<\/p>\n

The adaptation of primary school students<\/strong><\/h3>\n

If a child has moved to a new class in primary school, then it makes sense to talk to the new teacher yourself. Keep in mind that the child will spend a large part of their time in school under their control. Thus, they will build relationships with them, often depending on their success or failure in school.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s important for parents to find a way to approach the teacher. Ask them for help, talk over the impossibility of discussing your child\u2019s misses and mistakes in all classes, but only in person.<\/p>\n

The adaptation of high school students<\/strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/h3>\n

If we\u2019re talking about high school, then the relationships with the teachers won\u2019t be as important as the relationships with classmates. And here it\u2019s important to help them to establish communication with other kids in their class if the child struggles with this.<\/p>\n

What to do?<\/strong><\/h2>\n
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  1. \n

    Don’t impose your own experience<\/strong><\/h4>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    The first thing that parents should do in order to help their child pass this test is to separate your own personal fears and worries from those of your child.<\/p>\n

    It\u2019s very possible that you had an unfortunate experience moving to a new group. But this doesn\u2019t mean that your child will be faced with the same difficulties. Here a golden mean rule will be relevant: don\u2019t try to completely control your child\u2019s school life, constantly finding out who said and did what, but it is also not necessary to be completely separated from it, hoping that they will figure it out for themselves.<\/p>\n

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    1. \n

      Watch over the child<\/strong><\/h4>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

      Do you try to keep track of how much their behaviour changes after they start a new school? Have they started to cry more, become silent, close themselves up in their room? Stopped playing their favourite computer game and constantly sleep or, on the other hand, play for hours at a time, not even stopping to eat?<\/p>\n

      If you answered at least one question positively then maybe you can be sure that your child is under a lot of stress linked with their adaptation into a new group.<\/p>\n

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      1. \n

        Talk with your child<\/strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/h4>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

        Simply talk with them. Don\u2019t confine them to standards: \u2018How was school?\u2019 Ask more specific questions, for example:<\/p>\n

        \u2018I noticed that you\u2019ve become a little sad, you don\u2019t smile, don\u2019t tell me any news. Maybe you can tell me what\u2019s worrying you?\u2019<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

        In everyday conversations over a cup of tea make time not only for positive questions (but remember to include them also), but also for similar questions:<\/p>\n

        \u2018Tell me were you upset today in school? What did you worry about today? What was hard for you to do? Which of the kids said or did something insulting to another child today? Who swore at a teacher and for what? What do you think about this?\u2019<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

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        1. \n

          Participate and support<\/strong><\/h4>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

          First of all, you need to understand that a child needs support. Unfortunately, in our society support isn\u2019t accepted, but depreciation is (\u2018Yes that such-and-such has gone to another class, would they devour you there? What are you afraid of, you\u2019re a man! Come on, stop moaning, don\u2019t embarrass me, you\u2019re not little anymore\u2026\u2019 etc.). The most common variant of depreciation is: \u2018Don\u2019t worry, it\u2019ll all be ok\u2019.<\/p>\n

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          It\u2019s normal to worry! If you forbid a child to worry, then you are delaying their adaptation<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

          Put yourself in the child\u2019s shoes: you arrive to a new group, everyone is looking at you, judging you, laughing at you (especially if you are different), whispering about you and you need to find out how to approach different superiors (teachers). You need to know many spoken and unspoken rules that the group has already formed. You need to figure out how to somehow fit into this group, but you are, by default, an outsider.<\/p>\n

          You can support your child by sharing your emotions with them. Show them that you understand, that they\u2019re not alone in their feelings, and that you may have experienced the same. Good words of support could be:<\/p>\n

          \u2018I know that this isn\u2019t easy for you. Anyone in your shoes would be worried. It\u2019s normal. Both myself and your dad went through the same thing (here it\u2019s a good idea to share your experiences). It\u2019s a really difficult stage, but tell me how we can help?\u2019<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

          “Find<\/strong>myk<\/strong>ids” advice<\/strong><\/h2>\n

          If your child still doesn\u2019t make contact, but you suspect that they\u2019re having problems, you can engage them in a conversation with another adult that they trust (your friend, trainer, psychologist).<\/p>\n

          If, in this case, the child refuses to share their worries with you, use this life hack:<\/p>\n

          Install the app Findmykids<\/a> and listen to the sounds around the phone when they are at school. You will be able to listen to everything that is going on within a radius of 1-2 meters around the child. So you will be able to figure out exactly what the child\u2019s behaviour is linked to, whether it be bad relationships with peers, mocking from older students or conflicts with teachers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n
          \"fmk_05_andr_1024_preview\"<\/span><\/td>\n\n
          Install the app Findmykids<\/b><\/strong><\/h5>\n

          To listen and record your child’s surroundings!<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

          \"snimok-yekrana-2017-11-07-v-19-53-51\"<\/a><\/td>\n\"snimok-yekrana-2017-11-07-v-19-54-01\"<\/a><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

          \"\"<\/p>\n\t\t