Kids who can understand the feelings of others are less likely to lie. That\u2019s the conclusion reached by the authors of a study published in the Journal of Experimental Child Psychology in 2024. This has to do with a child\u2019s ability to imagine how a lie might affect someone else. This skill is called cognitive empathy\u2014and it can be developed.<\/p>\n
Cognitive empathy is the ability to think about and understand what another person is feeling and to imagine yourself in their place. It\u2019s not just about feeling sorry for someone\u2014it\u2019s about seeing the situation through their eyes.<\/p>\n
For example, if your child tells you they were hurt by someone, cognitive empathy helps you not only feel their pain but also understand why they\u2019re reacting that way.<\/p>\n
Sometimes, cognitive empathy is confused with emotional empathy. Emotional empathy is the ability to feel what someone else is feeling\u2014to \u201ccatch\u201d their emotions, so to speak. For example, when your child is crying, you might feel sad too or even start crying with them.<\/p>\n
Both types of empathy are important, but it\u2019s cognitive empathy that helps kids understand the consequences of their actions\u2014and that\u2019s what makes them lie less often.<\/p>\n
As kids develop empathy, they start to realize that lying can hurt others or lead to problems. And that becomes important to them.<\/p>\n
Carol Brady, PhD in clinical psychology from Walden University, recommends talking to kids in a way that helps them feel safe being honest\u2014and reminding them that they don\u2019t have to be perfect all the time.<\/p>\n
You can say something like: \u201cI\u2019m going to ask you something, and maybe you\u2019ll tell me something I won\u2019t like very much. But remember: what you do doesn\u2019t change how much I love you. I love you no matter what, and everyone makes mistakes. That\u2019s why I want you to think carefully and give me an honest answer.\u201d<\/em> Keep reminding your child that you love them no matter what\u2014and create an environment where they don\u2019t feel afraid to be honest.<\/p>\n The skill of cognitive empathy develops with age and involves the prefrontal cortex\u2014the part of the brain responsible for complex thinking. Cognitive empathy is one of the things that still sets us apart from robots (for now!).<\/p>\n Here\u2019s what can help your child better understand others:<\/p>\n Want to give these tips a try? At Findmykids, we believe you\u2019ve got this\u2014and we\u2019re here to support you every step of the way. And if not right away\u2014that\u2019s okay. Cognitive empathy takes time to develop.<\/p>\n
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\nWhen you give your child space to reflect on these words, they\u2019re more likely to tell you the truth.<\/p>\n\ud83d\udc99\u00a0How to Help Your Kid Develop Empathy<\/h2>\n
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