Overstimulated Mom? You’re Not Alone—Here’s What It Means

If you’ve ever felt irritated or at the end of your rope in situations where there’s a lot going on—your kids are fighting, you’re keeping an eye on dinner as it cooks on the stove, and notifications keep popping up on your phone—you may be an overstimulated mom.

You’re not alone! Mothers from around the world are connecting and sharing their feelings of overstimulation and how to feel calmer in chaotic situations.

Contents:

• What Does It Mean to Be an Overstimulated Mom?
• Signs You Might Be Overstimulated
• Why Modern Moms Are Prone to Overstimulation
• Coping Strategies That Actually Work
• Preventing the Burnout Spiral
• When to Seek Professional Help
• You’re Not a Bad Mom—You’re Just Overstimulated
• FAQs

What Does It Mean to Be an Overstimulated Mom?

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Being an overstimulated mom means feeling overwhelmed by too many sensory inputs and emotional demands.

Picture this: You’re making dinner while your toddler is tugging at your leg, your phone keeps pinging with texts and social media notifications, and the TV blares in the background. It’s a perfect storm of stressors, leaving you frazzled and on edge.

Overstimulation happens when you’re trying to juggle multiple responsibilities without a moment to recharge. It’s common in modern parenting due to constant connectivity and high expectations.

For moms, carrying that extra mental load can also contribute to sensory overload. Remember, it’s okay to feel this way, and there are ways to manage it and find peace.

Read also: Dealing with an Overstimulated Child: Practical Tips for Parents of Young Children.

Signs You Might Be Overstimulated

Feeling like you’re constantly on edge is a common sign of overstimulation and sensory processing sensitivity. Moms might experience anxiety, restlessness, and a strong urge for personal space, even from their beloved kids. Everyday day, like the constant chatter or crying, can feel overwhelmingly loud, adding to the sensation of not being able to breathe.

Common signs of overstimulation include:

• Irritability
• Difficulty focusing
• Restlessness
• Anxious
• Dizziness
• Extreme discomfort
• Fatigue
• Panic attacks
• Difficult to multitask

Triggers for overstimulation vary. Bright lights, crowded spaces, or even the repetitive bustling of day-to-day activities can make it hard to focus. These feelings often lead to irritability and tension.

For some, constant notifications from phones or social media scrolling can add an extra layer of stress. The demands of multitasking, especially when combined with lack of sleep, can leave moms feeling frazzled.

Recognizing these triggers is essential to managing overstimulation. Moms are encouraged to identify specific stressors, understand personal limits, and carve out moments of solitude to regain their calm and composure.

Why Modern Moms Are Prone to Overstimulation

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41% of moms have admitted to feeling overstimulated at times. In the hustle and bustle of modern parenting, moms face immense pressure to meet societal expectations of being the “perfect” parent. This constant demand can overwhelm anyone, but it especially affects those who are highly sensitive and neurodivergent or have sensory processing sensitivity.

High sensitivity means a person’s nervous system is more reactive to stimuli, making the chaotic energy of daily parenting duties a recipe for overstimulation. With endless tasks, little personal time, and perpetual distractions, it’s easy to feel like you’re drowning in noise and stress.

Societal Expectations

Mothers often face immense pressure to uphold the ideal of “gentle” and “perfect” parenting, where patience never wavers, and smiles remain constant. This expectation can become a heavy burden, as it suggests mothers should flawlessly manage every tantrum, scrape, or emotional upheaval without showing signs of stress or fatigue.

One culprit of this expectation is social media. Associate clinical professor Kate Gawlick, DNP, says, “I think social media has just really tipped the scales. You can look at people on Instagram, or you can even just see people walking around, and I always think, ‘How do they do that? How do they seem to always have it all together when I don’t?”

The relentless pursuit of perfection can leave moms feeling overwhelmed and overstimulated, as they strive to meet an unattainable standard while juggling countless other responsibilities.

Related: How to Be a Good Mother? Clue: It’s Not About Being ‘Perfect’.

Lack of Physical Boundaries

For many moms, constant physical contact can become overwhelming. The loving acts of co-sleeping and holding your baby all day long can sometimes feel like too much.

Over time, being constantly “on call” for hugs, snuggles, and being touched in other ways by toddlers and infants can lead to feeling “touched out.” This is when your skin feels like it needs a break from all the touching and cuddling, making you crave a few moments of personal space.

Constant Digital Noise

In our digital age, the barrage of notifications from social media, texts, calls, and news updates can quickly lead to overstimulation. Each ping or buzz breaks into your thoughts, making it hard to focus or relax.

One study found that frequent smartphone notifications can negatively impact mental well-being by increasing stress and decreasing attention span. This constant digital noise leads to sensory overload and makes it more challenging to achieve that ideal balance of calm and connection in your day.

Mental Load and Other Responsibilities

For many moms, their days are not spent at home with kids, but in their work offices. Whether they’re going to a workplace or working remotely, there’s usually a never-ending list to keep up with at home, too. This juggling act can feel like a three-ring circus, where each ring demands its own set of responsibilities and attention.

Imagine trying to focus on a work presentation while simultaneously thinking about what’s for dinner, whether there’s enough milk in the fridge, or when you’ll have time to tackle that growing pile of laundry. This is the mental load moms frequently bear—a constant cycle of planning and organizing. It’s not just about physically doing all the tasks but also about carrying the mental burden of remembering and coordinating them.

All these thoughts and responsibilities can easily lead to feeling overwhelmed. It’s like having a computer with too many tabs open, each one demanding attention and draining energy. Understanding that this mental load is a significant contributor to overstimulation can be reassuring, reminding moms that feeling this way isn’t a sign of weakness, but a natural response to balancing countless duties.

Coping Strategies That Actually Work

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Being a highly sensitive person means recognizing what triggers our sensory systems and learning how to cope with feelings of overstimulation. Here are some ways that you can do that.

Prioritize Sleep

Sleep deprivation can make the feeling of being overwhelmed much worse. When you’re short on sleep, your brain finds it harder to process information, manage emotions, and filter out noise. This can lead to sensory overload, where every sound, taste, or smell feels almost unbearable. That’s why getting around eight hours of sleep each night, if possible, is key.

To ease into sleep, consider using a white noise machine. The gentle, steady sound can block out disruptive noises and lull you to sleep. Additionally, avoiding blue light from devices like phones or tablets an hour before bed can significantly enhance your sleep quality. So, swap your screen time for a good book or some relaxing music to set the stage for better rest.

Take Some “Me” Time

Every mom deserves some moments of peace amidst the busy hum of daily life. Taking some “me” time isn’t just a luxury—it’s a necessity for your well-being. The reality is that most moms only get 36 minutes every day (that’s only 2.5% of the day) to themselves.

Whether you decide to slow down with a hobby, reading a book, or simply savoring a quiet cup of coffee, these moments offer a chance to slow down and find inner calm.

If you can’t get away from the house for some peace and quiet, try some noise-canceling headphones or noise-canceling earplugs while you relax to keep out sensory stimuli.

Step away from the constant demands, if only for a little while. By prioritizing these moments, you gift yourself the energy and patience needed to face motherhood’s challenges with renewed strength. Remember, a little self-care goes a long way and resets your sensory systems!

Breathing Exercises

Deep breathing exercises can be an effective way to combat overstimulation. By focusing on intentional breaths, you can trigger a relaxation response. Try inhaling deeply through your nose for a count of four, holding for four, and then exhaling through your mouth for another four counts.

This simple practice, often called box breathing, can help calm your mind and body, making it easier to manage stressful moments effectively.

Create Routines to Reduce Decision Fatigue

Establishing routines can ease the mental load by minimizing everyday decision-making. When you know exactly what needs to be cleaned on a specific day or have a meal plan laid out for the week, it reduces the stress of constant choices.

This predictability can free up mental space and prevent the overstimulation often caused by juggling numerous decisions.

Having a set plan means you spend less energy on thinking about what to do next. This allows you to focus your attention on more meaningful activities or simply enjoy some much-needed relaxation, supporting a calmer and balanced mind.

Limit Screen Time

Being constantly online and navigating through the buzz of social media platforms like TikTok can easily lead to feelings of anxiety and sensory overload. The fast-paced content, endless scrolling, and notifications compete for your attention, leaving little room for rest. This digital noise significantly contributes to the feeling of being overstimulated, as your mind is continuously bombarded with information and sensory input.

On top of managing your own screen time, you might find yourself worrying about your child’s digital activity. With so much exposure to devices, many parents feel anxious about managing their child’s screen time effectively.

This is where a parental control app like Kids360 can be a lifesaver. By allowing you to set screen time limits and block non-essential apps on your child’s device, it helps cut down on digital distractions. This means more peace of mind for you, knowing your child is engaged in less screen-centric activities, giving you space to focus on creating more serene and connected family moments.

Preventing the Burnout Spiral

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Overstimulation in parenting, with its relentless barrage of demands and sensory input, can quickly escalate into burnout. This state is more than just physical tiredness—it’s emotional exhaustion and detachment.

To prevent this spiral, acknowledge your limits and establish clear boundaries, ensuring space for self-care. According to mental health experts, integrating breaks and moments of creativity into your day can refresh your mind, avert frustration, and rekindle joy in parenting. Regular self-reflection is crucial; it aligns your needs with your energy levels, helping maintain balance.

Remember, recognizing early signs of burnout and addressing them is vital for your well-being and family.

When to Seek Professional Help

If you feel consistently overwhelmed and overstimulated, it might be time to reach out for professional help. When daily tasks feel impossible and you’re noticing persistent changes in your mood or behavior, a mental health professional or therapist can offer support and guidance.

Sometimes, feelings of anxiety or depression accompany overstimulation, and professional help can provide tailored strategies.

Seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. If you also notice a lack of joy from activities you used to enjoy or find it hard to concentrate, consider consulting a healthcare provider for further evaluation and assistance.

You’re Not a Bad Mom—You’re Just Overstimulated

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Feeling overstimulated doesn’t define your worth as a mom. It’s a sign of modern motherhood’s demands and the constant juggling act you perform daily. Remember, you’re not alone in this; many moms share this experience.

By recognizing the signs, finding strategies that work for you, and seeking support as needed, you can regain a sense of calm.

Embrace these challenges as opportunities for growth, and know that being an overstimulated mom simply means you’re doing your best!

FAQs

What does it mean to be overstimulated as a mom?

Moms who are overstimulated experience too many sensory inputs at once, such as noises, visuals, and touch. This can lead to feelings of irritability, lack of concentration, anxiety, and fatigue.

How to be less overstimulated as a parent?

Acknowledge that you have higher sensory processing sensitivity and what triggers it. Try to avoid these triggers while also taking time for yourself to regulate your nervous system and step away from sensory inputs.

What does ADHD look like in a mom?

Moms with ADHD might experience challenges like forgetfulness, difficulty focusing, and feeling overwhelmed easily. They often juggle multiple tasks, leading to increased anxiety and irritability. Managing household duties, children’s needs, and self-care can become particularly taxing, exemplifying some symptoms unique to parenting with ADHD.

How do I know if I’m overstimulated?

When you’re overstimulated, you might feel irritable, anxious, and dizzy while also having trouble focusing or multitasking. You may also feel symptoms of a panic attack in severe cases.

Cover image: Nicoleta Ionescu/Shutterstock