Valentine Jokes for Kids They’ll Love!

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner, and we’ve got the very best Valentine jokes for kids that’ll put a smile on your little one’s face. From silly funnies to clever puns, there’s plenty here for your child to love.

Contents:

• Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes for Kids
• Valentine Knock-Knock Jokes for Kids
• Silly Valentine Jokes for Kids
• Valentine Jokes for Kids: One Liners
• Cute Valentine Jokes for Kids
• Valentine’s Day Puns for Kids

Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes for Kids

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Valentine’s Day isn’t just about hearts and candy—it’s also the perfect time to share a laugh! Funny Valentine’s Day jokes for kids can add a playful twist to the holiday, whether you’re at home, in class, or at a party.

Here are some kid-friendly jokes that will have everyone giggling:

• Q. What did the pickle say to his Valentine?
• A. You mean a great dill to me!

• Q. What type of flowers should you never give on Valentine’s Day?
• A.Cauliflowers!

• Q. Who always has a date on Valentine’s Day?
• A.A calendar!

• Q. Where did the hamburger take his date?
• A. To the meat-ball!

• Q. What do you call the world’s smallest Valentine’s Day card?
• A.A Valen-teeny!

• Q. What’s a loaf of bread’s favorite song?
• A.“All You Knead is Love”!

• Q. How do girl snakes sign off their letters?
• A. With love and hisses.

• Q. What did one calculator say to the other on Valentine’s Day?
• A. Let me count the ways I love you!

• Q. What’s the most romantic part of a fork?
• A. It’s Valen-tines!

• Q. How do ghosts say they care for each other?
• A.I love boo!

• Q. What did the piece of string say to her boyfriend?
• A. Be my Valen-twine!

• Q. Why are flowers a perfect Valentine’s Day gift?
• A. Because they’re scent-imental!

• Q. What did the thread say to the needle?
• A. You’re sew special to me!

• Q. Why wasn’t the skeleton interested in celebrating Valentine’s Day?
• A. Because his heart wasn’t in it!

• Q. How did the doorbell propose to his girlfriend?
• A. He gave her a ring!

Talking about Valentine’s Day itself—do you and your kids know the origin of this holiday and why people celebrate it? Check this piece to uncover the history of Valentine’s Day, fun facts, and how it became the celebration of love and affection we know today. You’ll also find ideas on how to make Valentine’s Day for kids extra special!

Valentine Knock-Knock Jokes for Kids

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Knock-knock jokes never go out of style, especially when they come with a Valentine’s Day twist! These simple, fun jokes are easy for kids to remember and perfect for sharing with friends, family, or even classmates. Get ready for some silly door-knocking fun!

• Knock Knock; Who’s there?
• Olive; Olive who?
• Olive you!

• Knock Knock; Who’s there?
• Luke; Luke who?
• Luke who got a Valentine!

• Knock Knock; Who’s there?
• Bea; Bea who?
• Will you be my Valentine?

• Knock Knock; Who’s there?
• Peas; Peas who?
• Peas be my Valentine!

• Knock Knock; Who’s there?
• Harry; Harry who?
• Harry up and be my Valentine!

• Knock Knock; Who’s there?
• Donut; Donut who?
• Donut ever let me go!

• Knock Knock; Who’s there?
• Abby; Abby who?
• Abby Valentine’s Day!

• Knock Knock; Who’s there?
• Eye; Eye who?
• Eye wants to wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day!

• Knock Knock; Who’s there?
• Fangs; Fangs who?
• Fangs for being my Valentine!

• Knock Knock; Who’s there?
• Howard; Howard who?
• Howard you like to be my Valentine?

• Knock Knock; Who’s there?
• Al; Al who?
• Al be your Valentine if you’ll be mine!

• Knock Knock; Who’s there?
• Egg; Egg who?
• Egg-cited to be your Valentine!

• Knock Knock; Who’s there?
• Goat; Goat who?
• Goat to the Valentine’s Dance with me?

• Knock Knock; Who’s there?
• Halibut; Halibut who?
• Halibut being my Valentine?

• Knock Knock; Who’s there?
• Iris; Iris who?
• Iris you were here.

Want to make sure your kids stay safe while having fun on Valentine’s Day? With the Findmykids app, you can easily track your children’s location in real time, ensuring peace of mind while they enjoy their activities. It’s the perfect tool for busy parents who want to make the most of the holiday.

Silly Valentine Jokes for Kids

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If your kids love jokes that are just plain silly, this section is for them. These Valentine jokes are filled with goofy punchlines that might make you groan—but in the best way possible! Perfect for adding a little light-hearted fun to the day.

• Q. What did the stamp say to the envelope?
• A. I’m stuck on you!

• Q. What’s the difference between a girl who’s sick of her boyfriend and a sailor who falls into the ocean?
• A. One’s bored over a man and the other’s a man overboard!

• Q. What do you get if you cross a vampire with a snowman?
• A. Frostbite!

• Q. Why did the honeydew and the watermelon have a big wedding?
• A. Because they cantaloupe!

• Q. What do you say to an octopus on Valentine’s Day?
• A. I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand!

• Q. Why shouldn’t you date a tennis player?
• A. Because love means nothing to them!

• Q. Why do Valentine’s cards have hearts on them?
• A. Because brains would be gross!

• Q. What did the fungus say to his girlfriend?
• A. There’s so mushroom in my heart for you!

• Q. What do you write in a slug’s Valentine’s Day card?
• A. “Be my Valen-slime!”

• Q. What did the lump of coal say to her boyfriend, the match?
• A. You re-light my fire!

• Q. What do you call sweets that can keep a great beat?
• A. Candy wrappers!

• Q. What did the street performer say to her boyfriend on Valentine’s Day?
• A. Be mime!

• Q. What did the painter say to his beloved?
• A. I love you with all my art!

• Q. What did the cat say to her date?
• A. I think you are purrrrfect!

• Q. What type of candy is never on time?
• A. Choco-LATE.

Valentine Jokes for Kids: One Liners

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Short and snappy one-liners are great for kids who love quick jokes with big laughs. These Valentine’s Day one-liners are easy to remember and perfect for adding to cards, notes, or just telling a friend to brighten their day:

• Did you hear about the nearsighted porcupine that fell in love with a pincushion?
• You must be the Internet because I’m feeling a connection!
• I should rearrange the alphabet so I can put “U” and “I” together!
• You should be put in jail because you stole my heart!
• You’re like a dictionary because you add meaning to my life!
• I was wondering why my feet were so cold, and then I remembered that you knocked my socks off!
• I must be a snowflake as I’ve completely fallen for you!
• You’re much sweeter than any Valentine’s Day candy!
• Do you play soccer, because you’re a keeper!
• If you were a triangle you’d be an acute one!
• Roses are red, violets are blue, I bought chocolate…and ate it, too!
• If love is a battlefield I’m losing the war!
• Valentine’s Day is proof that my crush likes candy more than me!
• A man bought his wide refrigerator for Valentine’s Day; her face lit up when she opened it!
• Two fruits were in love but couldn’t get married—they weren’t a pear.
• Two antennas fell in love, and got married on Valentine’s Day—the ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was incredible!
• Karate teachers love Valentine’s Day jokes as they get a real kick out of them and always enjoy the punchlines!

Cute Valentine Jokes for Kids

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Valentine’s Day is all about sweetness, and these cute jokes are full of heart! They’re gentle, wholesome, and perfect for younger kids who enjoy light, feel-good humor. Share them with your little ones to spread smiles and warmth:

• Q. What do you call two birds in love?
• A. A pair of tweet-hearts!

• Q. Why did the sheriff lock up her boyfriend?
• A. Because he stole her heart!

• Q. What did one squirrel say to another squirrel on Valentine’s Day?
• A. I’m nuts about you!

• Q. What do you call two spiders who have just got married?
• A. Newly-webs!

• Q. What did one watermelon say to the other on Valentine’s Day?
• A. You are one in a melon!

• Q. What did the paper clip say to the magnet?
• A. I find you very attractive.

• Q. Which flower gives the best kisses?
• A. Tulips!

• Q. What did the lightbulb say to her date on Valentine’s Day?
• A. I love you watts and watts!

• Q. What did the dustpan say to the broom?
• A. You sweep me off my feet!

• Q. What do you call a romance that begins in an aquarium?
• A. Guppy love!

• Q. What do you call a pair of gloves that are in love?
• A. Smittens.

• Q. What grade did Cupid get on his exam?
• A. A B Mine-us!

• Q. Why was the sock sad on Valentine’s Day?
• A. He couldn’t find his sole mate.

• Q. What dinosaur do you need to look out for on Valentine’s Day?
• A. A Hug-O-Saurus Rex!

• Q. What’s red on the outside and has you on the inside?
• A. My heart!

Valentine’s Day Puns for Kids

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What’s Valentine’s Day without a good pun? Kids love clever wordplay, and these Valentine’s Day puns are packed with fun twists on classic holiday themes. They’re great for cards, crafts, or just to get a few laughs at the breakfast table:

• Q. What did the chef give his wife for Valentine’s Day?
• A. A hug and a quiche!

• Q. What do farmers get on Valentine’s Day?
• A. Lots of hogs and kisses!

• Q. What did one sheep say to the other on Valentine’s Day?
• A. I love ewe!

• Q. What did one volcano say to the other on Valentine’s Day?
• A. I lava you!

• Q. What did one oar say to the other?
• A. Are you interested in a little row-mance?

• Q. What did Robin Hood say to his sweetheart?
• A. I Sherwood like to be your Valentine.

• Q. What did the bear say to her Valentine?
• A. I love you beary much.

• Q. How does a thundercloud complement a bolt of lightning?
• A. It says “You’re looking striking!”

• Q. Why is pizza so good at getting dates?
• A. They have great delivery!

• Q. What does a ghost call his true love?
• A. His ghoul-friend!

• Q. What did the Jedi say to his sweetheart on Valentine’s Day?
• A. Yoda one for me!

• Q. What did the avocado say to her boyfriend?
• A. You totally guac my world!

• Q. Why did the banana and the orange fall in love?
• A. They found each other very a-peeling!

• Q. How did the fish meet his girlfriend?
• A. He was in the right plaice at the right time!

• Q. What did the cup of coffee say to its Valentine?
• A. I love you a-latte and you look brew-tiful!

Adorable Valentine Jokes to Make Kids Laugh Out Loud

Share the fun this Valentine’s Day with our bumper selection of jokes and puns that’ll tickle the whole family’s funny bone! Whether your little one appreciates some clever wordplay or loves a classic silly joke, you’ll find plenty here to fit the bill.

What’s your favorite Valentine’s joke for kids that never fails to give your child the giggles? Let us know—and make us laugh—in the comments box below!

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