Why Is My Child Struggling in School?

“My kid won’t do homework unless I push them.” “Their grades are slipping—what should I do?” Sound familiar? Many parents worry when their child’s school performance declines. Here’s how to get to the root of the problem and help turn things around.

Look for Changes

Pay attention to when and how your child’s behavior at school started to shift. Lower grades can be a sign of stress, fatigue, conflicts with classmates, missed lessons, or even adjusting to a new teacher.

Ask yourself:

• When did the struggles begin?
• Has anything changed at home or school?
• Is it all subjects, or just one or two?

Most of the time, there’s more than one reason behind academic struggles, and solving them takes time and patience.

Talk to Your Child

Try having a calm, open conversation. The goal isn’t to scold but to understand what’s going on. Kids often shut down when they feel judged or pressured, so frame your questions with curiosity, not frustration.

Instead of blaming, ask questions like:

• Which subject feels the hardest for you right now?
• Do you feel more tired than usual?
• Is there anything at school that’s been bothering you?
• What part of homework do you dislike the most? The writing? The reading? The amount?
• If you could change one thing about school, what would it be?

Framing it this way makes it easier for kids to open up and share whether they’re feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, or unmotivated.

Strengthen Thinking Skills

If your child is struggling with multiple subjects, it might not just be about the material—they may need to strengthen key cognitive skills like memory, focus, and problem-solving. These skills develop over a lifetime, but in school, they directly impact confidence and success in the classroom.

If you notice three or more of these signs, consider working on thinking skills first:

• Struggling in three or more subjects
• Avoids doing homework independently
• Easily distracted
• Skips letters when writing
• Slow writing or frequently erasures
• Reads without understanding the meaning
• Has trouble summarizing texts
• Needs topics explained multiple times
• Lacks interest in school
• Tires quickly during lessons
• Gets overly upset over mistakes

Key thinking skills for school success:

• Focus (staying attentive in class)
• Emotional Regulation (not freezing up when called on)
• Verbal Logic (participating in class discussions)
• Memory (memorizing multiplication tables, poems, and facts)
• Information Processing (understanding what they read, connecting ideas, writing their own thoughts)

Rather than drilling schoolwork, focus on games and daily tasks that build the cognitive abilities above:

• Focus — Try timed “beat the clock” challenges for homework
• Emotional Regulation — Role-play classroom situations and practice handling frustration.
• Verbal Logic — Discuss stories, play word association games, or debate silly topics.
• Memory — Play matching games, recall sequences, or practice storytelling.
• Information Processing — Use quick-thinking games like “20 Questions” or charades.

Create a Positive Learning Environment

A struggling child needs encouragement, not pressure. Celebrate small wins and focus on effort, not just results:

•  Instead of: “Why didn’t you get an A?”
•  Try: “I noticed you really stuck with that tricky problem—I love your perseverance!”

Confidence grows when kids feel capable, supported, and understood. With the right approach, they’ll start believing in their own abilities.